Smart Learning Newsletter
Helping You Help Your Kids Rewire Their Brain to Reach Their Smart Potential
Dr. MaryJo Wagner, Editor and Publisher
Vol 1. No. 8 August 6, 2010
Contents
- Note from Dr. MaryJo: Still figuring it out
- What's Happening at Smart Kids Smart Parents: August and September
- Smart Moms Get a Life: How To Say "NO"
"Smart Moms Get a Life" Complimentary Coaching Calls:
Ready to invest in yourself? Got parenting questions? ADHD questions? Set up a 30-minute complimentary "Smart Moms Get a Life" coaching call with Dr. MaryJo Wagner. Just let me know and we'll find a mutually convenient time.
Note from Dr. MaryJo
Still figuring out how I'll be doing your "Smart Learning Newsletter." Had some great feedback from last week's issue. Seems the consensus is that it's just too long. So I'm listening and shortening. Good idea when all of us are busy.
So for now, I'll be rotating "Smart Moms Get a Life" with Brain Games and general interest articles. This week I'm finishing up where we left off last week with Smart Moms Learning to say "NO." Then next week is all about getting organized for back-to-school. It's an essential task and skill for school success.
If you're disappointed that the "Best Brain Game for ADHD" isn't in this issue as promised, you'll find it in the Tuesday TeleTips for this week. Sign up now. It's always free.
In the meantime, I'm putting the finishing touches on a fabulous back-to-school TeleWebcast for you. I'll let you know when it's ready. And working away on my forthcoming book: "Four Families and a Baby with Two Names." It's the story of being an adopted only child, my struggles with ADHD, and all the adventures along the way.
When I'm out and about, I've been browsing the back-to-school sales to get pencils, markers, crayons, rulers, and assorted school supplies to send to Mayan Families for the kids in Guatemala. Probably won't get there until Christmas or when their new school year starts in January but the good school supply sales are now.
And starting to look for toys too. Just had an email from Mayan Families and their goal is a whopping 6,000 new and used toys for kids for Christmas. Let me know if you want to get school supplies or toys for these kids. Your gifts can be included in a shipment from the U.S. and I'll get you names and addresses for the shipments.
Now scroll down and take a look at what's happening at Smart Kids Smart Parents. Then read some tips on "saying "No." Remember: "You can't take care of others if you don't take care of yourself."
Enjoy!
Maybe your kids don't have ADHD after all and maybe just a change in diet will help with ADHD symptoms. To find out what looks like ADHD and isn't ADHD, I invite you to grab your copy of the FREE "Maybe They Don't have ADHD" inventory and checklist.
Discover 12 factors that can contribute to ADHD-like behavior Give it to teachers and parents. Help stop the over-diagnosis of ADHD! No more prescribing stimulant meds for kids who don't really have ADHD at all (Yes, ADHD is real but good chance your kid doesn't have it. And that's good news!
What's Happening at Smart Kids Smart Parents
Tuesday TeleTips: Always Free. Always recorded. Always an Action Guide. But you do need to sign up
August 10: The Best Brain Game for ADHD
August 17: Getting Organized: It's Good for the Brain! Good for School! Good for Mom!
August 24: Moms Get a Life: How to Take Care of Yourself while Taking Care of Everybody Else.
If there's something you'd like know, let me know and I'll get it into the September Tuesday TeleTips.
"The Smart Moms Show" every Thursday, 2 pm Eastern on Your Radio starting in Sept.
Sept. 2: "Aromatherapy for ADHD" with Barbara Schwartz
Sept. 9: Dr. Mommy's "Life Lessons" for Happy, Healthy Kids with Dr. Daisy Sutherland
Sept. 16: "The Super Confitelligent Child with Denise Hornbeak
Watch for the Super Back-to-School Special from Smart Kids Smart Parents.
Coming soon!
Smart Moms Get a Life: Learning to Say "NO"
"You can't take care of others if you don't take care of yourself."
I admit that when I really wanted to say "NO," it wasn't that hard. There's a certain authority that just comes with being 6 feet tall! And then according to my oldest son, I just had "that look" when I meant "NO." Now I'm not sure what "that look" was but I do know that it worked!
As for my Mom, when she said "NO," the whole neighborhood trembled!
But what if it's hard? And for most of us right now, it feels hard. Here are some things you can do to make saying "NO" easier:
1. Remind yourself that kids need boundaries. Boundaries keep them safe and feeling protected. It helps them learn responsibility. (Even when they whine and want to argue.)
2. Decide ahead of time what you're going to say "NO" to. Make sure you and your spouse agree. Have this discussion ahead of time. Saying "NO" and then having Dad say "Yes" doesn't work.
3. Practice saying "No" in a firm, no nonsense way in the mirror. Give one simple straightforward reason. Or role play it with your spouse or a good friend. Ask them for feedback.
4. Don't argue. Period. This can be a challenge. Kids will push.
5. Don't yell! Let me repeat: Don't yell! When my son was a "tween" and then a teenager and I was tempted to yell, I stopped myself and wrote him notes which I put on the fridge. Something like this: Dear Stephen: You are not to talk back to me. If you do, you will not be allowed to play video games for a week. I love a you a lot. You are a wonderful son. Love, Mom. He was stunned at first. Even commented that I didn't yell at him. And the notes on the fridge worked.
6. Fridge notes may not work in your family if you have kids with reading challenges. But you'll need to find some strategy to keep from arguing and yelling. One Mom I know, after she's said "NO," she tells her daughter she loves her and then says "now I have to get back to work" and goes into her office.
7. Keep you word. If it was "NO" on Monday, it's still "NO" on Tuesday. Giving in teaches your kids that they can keep pushing and that "NO" doesn't really mean "NO."
Let us know what works at your house. How do you say "NO" to your kids. How do you keep from arguing and/or yelling. I'll share the answers in a future newsletter.
In the meantime, I invite you to get your complimentary "Smart Moms Get a Life" coaching call today. It's time to take care of yourself! Your kids will thank you for it in the future and you'll both live through it now.
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Watch for next week's "Smart Learning Newsletter" where you'll find strategies on getting organized for back-to-school.
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